Can't Tell You Why
by Seylin
Summary: Kurama is sick and he's going to die doesn't tell Hiei. Hiei is hurt by this and leaves, Kurama calls for him he returns. After his second leave, Yusuke must find him when Kurama passes out. DISCONTINUED


Note: I do not own YYH! Please don't sue me! - Alkvingiel

Can't Tell You Why

Kurama sat in a leather chair in the doctor's office unable to believe what he had just heard. "Are you sure? I mean I thought I just had the flu or a bad case of a cold or…something. How can this be?" 

"Mr. Shuuichi, I understand that you are in shock but as it stands you have cancer and even with treatment you have only 5 months to live. I'm sorry," The doctor answered. Kurama walked home slowly letting all this sink in. He couldn't tell Kaasan about this not yet, so when he walked in he acted as if everything was the same. She smiled and gave him a hug then went back into the kitchen. 

"Supper will be ready at 6 so be hungry, and we're having your favorite," She told him. Kurama nodded as he went up to his room. Opening the door and sliding in he saw that Hiei was already there and asleep on his bed. As quietly as he could Kurama sat at his desk and tried to work on his homework but there were just so many things on his mind he couldn't concentrate. He stared out the window at the setting sun and then he glanced at Hiei's back, which was toward him. Suddenly his eyes blurred and he choked back a gasp, Kurama lay his head on his folded arms on the desk and cried silently trying to think of how he was going to tell Hiei. "Minamino! Supper is ready!" Kaasan called. Kurama stood wiping his tears away and went downstairs. In his room Hiei turned over his ruby eyes filled with worry. 

"_Why was Kurama crying_?" He wondered. Hiei had been awake ever since Kurama came in and was about to turn over when he'd heard Kurama's sobs. About an hour later Kurama came back up to his room with a solemn look on his face but he smiled brightly when he saw that Hiei was awake. 

"Hiei! I came in earlier but you were asleep, I did not want to wake you," Kurama smiled and he sat at his desk. 

"I was awake Kurama, why were you crying?" Hiei asked. A shocked look covered Kurama's eyes, he hadn't meant for Hiei to hear. 

"I had a hard day at school and needed to blow some stress," Kurama said not meeting his eyes. 

"You're lying Kitsune. I've watched you at school before; everyone there loves you too much to give you a hard time. What's bothering you?" Hiei questioned. 

"I do not want to talk about it! Please…just drop it," Kurama begged. Hiei, for once looked hurt and he stood. 

"Fine Kurama if you feel that you can not trust me enough to tell me what is wrong then maybe I do not need to be here. I am leaving for awhile, I will be in the Makai. You know how to reach me, goodbye," Hiei told him and jumped out of the window. Kurama stood at his window watching as his little fire demon disappeared part of him wanted to call out but he didn't. Over the next month Kurama went to school but his cold never left and finally he couldn't stand to go to school anymore; not from the cold but from the pain of the cancer spreading. He still hadn't told anyone about the cancer and didn't plan on it anytime soon even since it had been a month. Finally he told his mother that he wished to go on homebound because he didn't wish for any of the other students getting whatever he had. Shiori agreed saying it would be better than making everyone sick, so she went to the school and arranged everything. 

Kurama sat on his windowsill reading a book but he couldn't concentrate on the words, his mind kept traveling back to Hiei. He still expected to come in one day and Hiei would be there lounging on his bed but in the month and two weeks since their fight he hadn't seen or felt the fire youkai. "_I am sorry Hiei, please come back. I miss you…_" Kurama thought sadly and he got up. Over the last month the cancer had spread and with that came more pain and tiredness. Kurama put his book down and lay on his bed, he covered with a blanket and quickly fell asleep. In the Makai Hiei was also sitting on the windowsill in his room at Mukuro's when Kurama's voice entered his mind. "Please come back…I miss you." That was all he needed, Hiei ran out of his room told Mukuro that he would be back in a few days and headed to the nearest portal to the Ningenkai.

Hiei jumped into the familiar tree outside of Kurama's room, he smirked looking at the open window. He jumped to the windowsill and looked to the desk where Kurama was usually studying when he came but Kurama wasn't there. Hiei looked around the room and saw his kitsune asleep on the bed, his heart melted seeing the pure beauty of his fox. Without making a sound Hiei took off his cloak, went over to the bed and lay down. He wrapped his arms around the sleeping Youko and gently kissed his lips. Slowly with a smile of both love and hunger he went to Kurama's earlobe and nibbled gently. "Hmm…" Kurama moaned and Hiei leaned back wanting to see his fox wake up. Kurama wrinkled his nose adorably and then his eyes slowly fluttered open to be met by Hiei's ruby red eyes. "Koibito!" Kurama exclaimed wrapping his arms around Hiei. His lover pleased him even more when he sealed his lips with a kiss. Kurama pulled back finally and snuggled closer to Hiei's warm body. Hiei felt something warm and wet on his chest and he looked at Kurama who had hot tears running down his face. 

"Kitsune…" Hiei started to ask why he was crying but remembered what had happened the last time and stopped himself. 

"Gomen ne Hiei…I am just so glad you are back," Kurama told him wiping his tears away.

"I am happy to fox…now how about some fun?" He questioned with a smile. Kurama grinned back and quickly felt out with his ki.

"Hai, Kaasan is not here. She went to the…umph!" Kurama said but was silenced by another of Hiei's kisses. A couple hours later Kurama lay gently stroking Hiei's back. "_Oh Hiei…I am so glad you are back but I just do not know how to tell you that I only have four months to live. It is true that I will just go back to Youko form but still…_" Kurama thought. After Hiei woke up Kurama was now asleep and he took this time to get dressed. Kurama yawned and opened his eyes to see Hiei fastening his cloak. "You are leaving? How long will you be gone?" Kurama asked. 

"I have to patrol Mukuro's borders so probably about two weeks," Hiei replied sitting on the edge of the bed. 

"I will miss you Koorime and be careful. Ai Shiteru Hiei," Kurama whispered and closed his eyes again. 

"Ai Shiteru kitsune," Hiei replied and left. Two weeks later Kurama had gotten tired of staying in his room and had actually felt up to it so he went out to see what was going on in the city. He took a small bag of things with him because he had this feeling that he would need them before today was over. Kurama had left a note for Kaasan saying that he was going to stay with some friend's for a while and that he'd completed his school work up to the end of the year. Just as Kurama was about to head for Genkai's someone yelled his name and he turned to see Yusuke running toward him. 

"Hello Yusuke. How are you?" Kurama questioned when Yusuke caught up with him. 

"Fine I guess. Word around school is that you like dropped out or something?" Yusuke asked. 

"No…I have been pretty sick lately and I did not want anyone else in school getting what I have so I went to home schooling. I have already finished all the work for the rest of the year," Kurama explained. They walked and talked but Yusuke noticed that he had started holding his side all of a sudden and was squeezing just slightly, he was becoming very pale. He was just about to ask if anything was wrong when Kurama fell against the wall gasping for breath. 

"Kurama! What's wrong?" Yusuke questioned helping his friend not fall to the ground. 

"Uh…please Yusuke…get me to Genkai's…" Kurama begged. Yusuke pulled one of Kurama's arms over his shoulder and ran as quickly as they could to get to the temple. By the time Yusuke got Kurama to Genkai's he was unconscious. 

"Yusuke? What the? What is wrong with Kurama-san?" Genkai asked when Yusuke got to the top of the stairs. 

"I was hoping Yukina might be able to tell me. We were just walking through the city when he collapsed against the wall and begged me to bring him here," Yusuke explained. 

"Oh my…take him into that room over there and I will get Yukina," She told him. Yusuke lay Kurama on the mat in the middle of the floor a stared at his friend who he knew was in pain for a few minutes and then Yukina came running in. 

"Kurama-san! What happened?" Yukina questioned. Kurama weakly opened his eyes to look at her, he lifted his hand shaking slightly and took hers. 

"Yukina-chan…please…I know it will not work for long but please try to heal me…please…" Kurama begged. Yukina swallowed but nodded nervously. Kurama smiled and lay back his eyes closed again. He knew that after Yukina tried to heal him she would know and most likely would tell Yusuke and Genkai but right now he was in so much pain that he didn't care. 

"_What he does he mean heal him? He's not wounded?_" Yusuke asked himself. Yukina rested her hands on his chest and her hands glowed a faint red sending healing power into his body. After a few minutes they heard him sigh and he relaxed then Yukina opened her eyes with a gasp and tears in her eyes. 

"Yukina! What is it!" Genkai questioned.

"Oh Genkai-sama…he is dying…" Yukina cried. 

"What!!" Both Genkai and Yusuke chorused in shock. 

"He has what the Ningens call cancer and it is incurable with their medicine. Kurama-san…he only has… three months to live…" Yukina whispered. Genkai and Yusuke were stunned into silence. A few hours later Kurama opened his eyes to see Yusuke looking at him with a worried expression. 

"So Yukina told you?" Kurama asked quietly. 

"Yeah, Kurama? Why have you been keeping this from us? This is why you went homebound? Does your mother know? Does Hiei?" Yusuke questioned. 

"For one I never see you or Kuwabara so that is why you did not know. Second, yes this is why I went homebound I could not stand the pain anymore and did not want my _fan club_ to know. Third, no I have not told my mother she would just walk around watching me crying…I do not want that. She does know that I am staying with some friends. And forth, no I have not told Hiei either…I have not found the right way to tell him. I would revert to my Youko form yes but… I do not know what to say," Kurama explained. 

"You will have to tell Hiei and your mother soon. You can not keep it from them for to long. As soon as Hiei comes into the Ningenkai he will know you are here and wonder why," Yusuke told him. 

"I know Yusuke but I am just so scared. I never feared death when I was the famed Youko Kurama because I did not believe anyone could kill me and they never did until that one man. And then here, this town is safe and no kids under 21 have died in 30 years but now I am dying because of a stupid disease," Kurama said quietly, his head down so Yusuke could not see his face but he did see the tears. Yusuke moved over and put his arms around Kurama and he started to cry. Within a few minutes Kurama was asleep again and Yusuke went to talk to Yukina and Genkai. 

"I can't believe it. It just seems impossible. After all we've been through and he's dying of this disease. Isn't there anything you can do Yukina?" Yusuke questioned. 

"I'm afraid not…I can only take away his pain for maybe two or three hours at a time," Yukina answered. 

"Is it okay if he stays here then Genkai?" Yusuke asked. 

"I would be more than happy to have Kurama stay here," Genkai replied. Yusuke started to walk off but Yukina called out to him. 

"Yusuke-san! Where are you going?" She asked. 

"To find Hiei," Was his answer and then he disappeared. 

After a week and a half of tracking across the Makai Yusuke finally picked up on Hiei's ki and found him that night in a tree. Well actually Yusuke was looking around and Hiei jumped down to attack but then he saw who it was. 

"Yusuke? What are you doing here?" Hiei asked. 

"Looking for you, I need you to come to Genkai's as fast as you can," Yusuke told him. 

"Hn. Why do I need to go there?" Hiei questioned turning away. 

"Kurama's there and he's really sick. He couldn't tell you himself but he's dying…Hiei you need to get back to him," Yusuke whispered. Hiei spun around and glared at him. 

"What!" He yelled. 

"Kurama has three months to live," Yusuke replied. Before he could blink Hiei was gone and he was alone to find his way back to Genkai's. Genkai looked up just as Hiei appeared at the top of the stairs. Her eyes widened when she saw him but just pointed to the room where Kurama was sleeping. Hiei slid open the door to see Kurama lying on a pallet sleeping soundly, he didn't look sick but then he cried out a little. The sound itself made Hiei wince and Yukina came in but she froze when she saw Hiei. 

"Yukina…" Hiei started. Kurama's cry cut him off again and Yukina ran over to use her healing powers. Kurama opened his eyes to thank her but she wasn't looking at him and he looked over to where she was and saw him. Slowly he sat up gasping for breath just at these simple efforts. 

"Hiei…" Kurama whispered. Hiei just stared and then disappeared. "No! Wait! Hiei…uh…" Kurama groaned. Yukina moved to help him stand.

"Kurama-san…you really shouldn't get up," Yukina said quietly as he caught his breath. 

"I must talk to him…" Kurama whispered back. Kurama followed Hiei's ki to the back garden. Hiei stood there trying to clam his raging feelings. He was so angry and yet so hurt that Kurama hadn't told him something was wrong. He heard something behind him and knew it was Kurama. 

"This is why you were crying that day wasn't it? You had found out and that was what you couldn't tell me?" Hiei questioned not turning to face him. 

"Yes…I had went to the doctor to see if there was anything I could get to get rid of the cold I'd had for awhile but he told me that it wasn't a cold I had but cancer. When I came home and saw you lying there on my bed I just didn't know how to tell you…I love you so much Hiei. I just couldn't tell you," Kurama whispered. 

"I feel betrayed Kurama. I told you, you could always tell me anything and yet you chose to keep this from me when you knew it would hurt," Hiei replied. Kurama was about to say something when another pain seized his body, he gasped and his knees gave out under him. Hiei turned worried just in time to catch him as he fell to the ground. "Kurama?" He questioned scared. With tears in his eyes Kurama looked up at Hiei. 

"It's getting worse quicker now. Hiei I want you to do something for me. I'm going to ask Yusuke to bring my mother here so I can tell her then…I want you…you to kill me. Take my pain away…then we can be together forever. You like you are and me in my Youko form, please Hiei do this one thing for me," Kurama begged and he passed out. Hiei was stunned so stunned that for a few minutes he couldn't move and then blindly took Kurama back to the room he'd come out of and laid him on the mat. He sat there for a long time before Yusuke's voice broke him out of his thoughts. 

"Genkai said you guys had a long talk. What did he say?" Yusuke whispered. 

"He wants you to go and bring his mother here so he can tell her and then…then he wants me to take his life," He replied quietly. Yusuke was shocked! He never thought that Kurama would ask a favor like that and he didn't know if Hiei could do it. Once Kurama's ningen body was no more he would revert back to his Youko form. Yusuke had heard of the great beauty of Youko's from others and especially of the beauty of the famed Youko Kurama but he had never seen it for himself. 

"I…I don't know what to tell you Hiei. I guess this is something you have to decide for yourself," Yusuke whispered putting a hand on his shoulder. After a few minutes like that Yusuke left to get Shiori. Hiei didn't care what Muroku had to say about this he could destroy any Youkai she sent his way and right now he needed to be by Kurama's side. Two days later Yusuke came to the temple with Shiori, she had been worried by her Minamino's letter and was more than happy to follow Yusuke when he told her he knew were Minamino was. "Wait here," Yusuke whispered disappeared behind the door to Kurama's room. Hiei glanced at Yusuke as he came in.

"What?" He asked seeing Yusuke's look. 

"I need you to leave for a few minutes. Kurama's mother is here and she needs some time to talk to him and straighten some things out," Yusuke told him. 

"I'm not leaving," Hiei said crossing his arms. 

"Don't make me carry your ass out of here, now go," Yusuke replied opening the door for him. Hiei glared at him as he stood ready to fight but Kurama's voice broke into his thoughts.

"Just a few minutes Hiei, I just need a few minutes with her…to explain everything," Kurama said quietly. Hiei nodded and followed Yusuke out of the room and watched as Shiori walked in then Yusuke closed the door. 

"Minamino? What is going on? Why did you leave this letter? What's wrong?" Shiori questioned. Kurama slowly sat up with some difficulty and took a deep breath. Over the next hour and a half Kurama explained everything while Shiori listened quietly and in shock. Finally he couldn't sit up anymore and he lay back down. "Oh Minamino! Why didn't you tell me first of all?" She whispered. 

"I was scared of what you would do. I lived in the Ningenkai for 18 years now and I've seen what people can do when their scared of something they don't understand. I did not want to be treated as something and but as someone," Kurama replied. Shiori had untouched tears running down her cheeks as she listened. 

"I always knew you were different Minamino…I just didn't know how. There is something you must know Minamino, nothing you ever do or something you become or are could ever stop me from loving you. You are my son and I will do anything for you. Is there anything I can do?" Shiori explained. 

"You already have Kaasan, by telling me that you don't care that I am what I am. I will make sure that you are safe for as long as you live it's all I can do. Thank you for loving me, goodbye," Kurama whispered with a smile and he grasped her hand. Shiori leaned down and kissed his hand before kissing his cheek and then she got up to leave. She stopped at the door and with one glance back she left never to see her son in that form again. Once she had left Hiei came back into the room and saw the tears running from Kurama's eyes. 

"Kurama…I don't…" He started but Kurama's eyes met his. 

"Hiei please…take my pain away…make me myself again," Kurama said quietly. Hiei fought with himself for a few minutes and then pulled out his katana. Kurama smiled and closed his eyes. Quickly as to get this over with he plunged his katana straight into Kurama's heart, Kurama didn't make a sound he only had a slight smile on his lips. Yusuke walked in just as Hiei pulled out his katana. He was about to ask what had he just done when a bright light glowed. Genkai and Yukina ran up when the light came out of the door, they along with Yusuke stood in shock. Vines wrapped around Kurama's body shielding the light and it stayed like that for at least ten minutes before the vines lifted up looking something like a mummy. The light coming between the gaps in the vines stopped and then they fell away. Yusuke gasped when Kurama's golden eyes met his. He'd never in his life seen anything so beautiful, Kurama's long sliver hair fell down behind him and his ten tails shimmered in the dull light. 

"Welcome back Youko Kurama," Genkai greeted him. 

"It's good to be back Genkai," Kurama replied stretching. Something red caught Yusuke's eye and he looked to see what it was. A sliver pendent that had a red stone in the middle hung loosely from around Kurama's neck. 

"Hey! That's the necklace the guy you fought had when we fought against that Netherworld guy!" He exclaimed. Kurama looked down and brought his hand up to the pendent and touched it lightly, he smirked and then dropped his hand again. 

"Yes…I kept it after that battle. Kuronue was my partner and a good friend, this pendent meant a lot to him and I will protect it since he can not. I will not let evil hands have it," Kurama replied. 

TBC…Maybe…should I write more? If I should give me an idea of where to take this. Thanks! Ja Ne! - Alkvingiel


End file.
